Joseph was in a difficult situation. The woman he loved and was supposed to marry was with child, and he knew that it wasn’t his baby. He was a good man who wanted to do the right thing. Under the law, she should be stoned, but he doesn’t want that to happen. Instead, he decides to divorce her quietly. Before he can do that, an angel appears to him in a dream. “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home. For it is through the Holy Spirit that this child has been conceived in her. . . When Joseph awoke, he did as the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took his wife into his home.” (Matthew 1:20-24)

In an instant, Joseph’s life was turned upside-down. Whatever he had imagined his life with Mary was going to look like, this wasn’t it. Like Mary, he had a choice. He could have said “No.” He could have ignored the dream, divorced Mary, and gone on to have a nice quiet life with another young lady from Nazareth. Sure, he would have had some challenges, but he could have avoided the need to flee from Bethlehem in the middle of the night. He wouldn’t have had to bear the responsibility of making sure that the savior of the Jewish people made it to adulthood. No doubt, it would have been the easier path.

Joseph didn’t do that. Instead, he took the message to heart and obeyed God without question. He had no idea where the path would lead. He was only given the next step – take Mary as your wife. He had to wait and trust in God to see how it would all turn out.

In Advent, we call to mind that unfailing trust that Mary and Joseph had in God’s plan. They were one-hundred percent willing to cooperate with God’s plan. They were human. They must have had fear and uncertainty. There were plenty of times when the road was hard. They must have had moments when they wondered where God was leading them. Yet, they trusted.

I have much to learn from that trust. Admittedly, God’s messages to me don’t come straight from an angel (at least not any that I am aware of). They come in quiet whispers in prayer, in God’s Word in scripture, in the words of a trusted friend or the guidance of my spiritual director. Still, I am much more likely to question then to answer with a trusting “Yes.” I debate, pray some more, think about it, try it my way, fall on my face (repeatedly), get up, try again, pray some more, and eventually come around to doing it God’s way. Perhaps you can relate?

During these days of Advent, I want to try to be more like St. Joseph. I want to trust that God has a plan that is better than mine, even when I can only see the first step. I want to believe that God will always keep me in his loving care and that faithfulness to God will always work for my eternal good. Lord, I believe. Please help my unbelief.

Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Who is Jesse and why does his tree matter? Jesse was the father of King David. Jesus is considered to come from the line of David (through his foster-father Joseph who was from the house of David). The name of the Jesse Tree is taken from Isaiah 11:1, in which Jesus is referred to as a shoot coming up from the stump of Jesse. A Jesse Tree tells of many of the significant individuals in salvation history.

There is no official version of a Jesse Tree, but it generally begins with Adam and Eve and includes such notable figures in Biblical history as Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Samuel, Jesse, David, and Solomon. It ends with Joseph and Mary and finally the Christ Child himself.

Hanging one ornament a day during Advent for each of these figures allows us to walk with all those who came before Jesus and waited for him. It also provides the opportunity to learn more about these Biblical figures.

The word “Advent” comes from the Latin “adventus” which means “coming.” In our liturgical Advent, we wait for the annual commemoration of Christmas, but we are also waiting for Jesus’ second coming. Like the Biblical figures of old, we too are waiting.

How does one go about creating a Jesse Tree of one’s own? A Jesse Tree can be as simple or as elaborate as you choose to make it. In our house, we use a paper tree taped to the wall and glue paper ornaments on it. Others use a branch brought in from the outside, plant it in a pot, and then hang ornaments on it. For those who choose not to decorate a Christmas tree until Christmas Eve, Jesse Tree ornaments can be hung on the evergreen itself, thereby creating an “Advent” tree. Ornaments can be created out of paper or out of felt or fabric.

There are many listings of symbols and readings on-line that can help you in creating your Jesse Tree. I have provided a few below. However you choose to create a Jesse Tree, I hope that it will be a fruitful and enriching activity for you and your families this Advent season.

http://www.shalfleet.net/advent/makeajessetree.htm

http://www.eriercd.org/jessetree.htm

http://www.osv.com/Portals/0/images/pdf/JesseTree.pdf



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

A Time to Plant: Life Lessons in Work, Prayer, and Dirt

He speaks of embracing a “‘vocation of location’ in which we make and maintain a particular place of belonging in the world.” That vocation can include a whole list of domestic duties. These are the things that we are so familiar with – cleaning, doing the laundry, cooking, doing dishes, paying the bills, etc. Those are all important and necessary tasks, but home should mean more than that.

Kramer writes, “‘home economy’ means finding and creating a peaceable home in the overlapping circles of family, friends, neighbors, church, and the wider community.” With so many people so busy with obligations outside of the home, the concept of “home has been replaced by the cheaper idea of ‘house’ . . . an afterthought of a place where we grab a bite to eat, watch television, escape from our jobs, make love and war with our family members, pay the bills, surf the Internet, and collapse for a few hours of sleep.”

Kramer challenges us to think of home as much more than that, to perhaps reclaim a sense of home that earlier generations possessed. “Home can and should be a center of meaning and purpose in our lives. Home should invite us and strengthen us to the good work of belonging fully to a place and to its people.”

Sometimes moving to a new geographical area is necessary. It can be part of a God-given calling. However, there is something to be said for making a commitment to a certain area, for putting down roots and staying there through thick and thin. Even in an era when we can keep in contact with friends and relatives around the world with a touch of a button, face-to-face relationships are still vitally important.

There is no replacement for the friendships and family relationships that develop by spending quality time with others over a number of years. Watching children grow up, sharing meals, knowing and trusting your neighbors, worshipping together – these are the things of which true homes are made.

In this holiday season when so much emphasis is placed on home, it is a good time to think about what it means to create a sense of home. How can the environment we create within our own four walls then carry out to the world at large? How can we better commit to the people who share our house, our extended families, our neighborhoods, and our churches?



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Walking Together: Discovering the Catholic Tradition of Spiritual Friendship

Reviewed by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Our world does not seem to allow for deep friendships today. Family and friends are often separated by physical distance. Our lives are so busy that even keeping up with people via electronic means can be a challenge. One is lucky to have one or two close friends. A spiritual friend is an even rarer gift. In Walking Together: Discovering the Catholic Tradition of Spiritual Friendship, Mary DeTurris Poust emphasizes the value of such friendships while acknowledging the difficulty in forming them.

What makes a spiritual friend different from a “regular” friend? They are “two people bound together by a love of God.” They walk side by side, with God always in between. “Spiritual friends magnify our virtuous qualities. More casual friends might bring out the worst in us through competitiveness, idle gossip, jealousy. Spiritual friends, however, bring out the best – in inspiring us to live in humility, honesty, charity. Spiritual friends inspire us to move beyond pettiness to a place where our hearts and minds are focused on doing what is right.” The goal that both parties are reaching for is life with God in heaven.

Poust profiles some famous spiritual friendships, holding them up as a model for our own lives. The bonds between St. Frances de Sales and St. Jane de Chantal, C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkein, and St. Francis and St. Clare are all discussed. Poust, who seems to have been extraordinarily blessed in this area, also shares her own experiences of spiritual friendship.

Poust offers some practical advice on how to find and nurture spiritual friends. She also examines spiritual direction, which can sometimes develop into a spiritual friendship. Some time is devoted to spiritual friendships between men and women, both within marriage and outside of it. She acknowledges that there can be challenges in celibate opposite-sex friendships and cautions that the temptations toward infatuation and romantic interest must be overcome in order for a healthy, loving friendship to develop and flourish. If one or both of the parties are married, great care must be taken to make sure that the friendship does not threaten the marriage in any way. Despite these concerns, Poust does feel that male-female spiritual friendships can be a great blessing and she has benefited from them in her own life.

Spiritual friendship is a rare and good gift. It is to be greatly treasured. Hopefully, Walking Together: Discovering the Catholic Tradition of Spiritual Friendship will encourage many to pursue them in their own lives.

Order Walking Together: Discovering the Catholic Tradition of Spiritual Friendship and support CatholicMom.com with your purchase

Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

The presiding priest did a wonderful job of explaining each part of the ceremony. When he was about to anoint the children with the sacred chrism, he described how this set the child apart and united them with Jesus’ mission as priest, prophet and king.

What does it mean to be “set apart?” Cheryl Dickow tackles that question in Our Jewish Roots: A Catholic Woman’s Guide to Fulfillment Today by Connecting with her Past. She describes how in the “Old Testament people and things had often been set aside for specific purposes. . . priests were ‘set aside’ for specific duties. Utensils, vessels, and garb that were meant for service at the altar of the temple were ‘set apart’ and would not to be implemented elsewhere.” Dickow goes on to explain how in the New Testament, St. Peter encourages the newly baptized to be “set apart for God’s purpose.”

Our baptism should matter. It isn’t merely a one time event. Admittedly, like the children who became part of the Church today, most of us don’t remember our reception of the sacrament. Our parents and Godparents made a commitment to the faith for us. Yet, even though we were unaware, the sacrament still changed us forever.

Baptism not only wipes away original sin (as well as any sins that have been committed by the individual), “but also makes the neophyte ‘a new creature,’ an adopted son of God, who has become a ‘partaker of the divine nature,’ member of Christ and co-heir with him, and a temple of the Holy Spirit.” (CCC 1265)

After being baptized and anointed, the child or adult being baptized puts on a white garment, which emphasizes this fundamental change. “The person baptized has ‘put on Christ,’ has risen with Christ. . . The baptized are ‘the light of the world.’” (CCC 1243)

As Christians, we are called to be set apart. We are called to holiness, to live according to the teachings of Christ. We should be different from the world at large. People should be able to tell that we are Christian by the way that we live our lives.

Do we live out that call to be “set apart?” How can we improve the way we live out our baptismal commitment?

Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Full of Grace: Miraculous Stories of Healing and Conversion Through Mary’s Intercession

Reviewed by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Christine Watkins grew up without religion and without a belief in God. Her parents had told her that Jesus was a fairytale and that when you died you became part of the dirt and helped nourish plants. As an adult, she searched in vain for some shred of hope and direction. She explored all sorts of New Age practices and followed the advice of a psychic that led her nowhere. Meanwhile, her promiscuous lifestyle had ravaged her body, leaving her afflicted with cervical cancer. It was at this point that God intervened in her life. Her friend Joseph reached out to her, helped her to pray, and taught her about God. Jesus even cured her of cancer. She completely reformed her life. She earned Master of Theological Studies and Master of Social Welfare degrees and became a spiritual director, bereavement counselor, inspirational speaker and retreat leader. She also developed a deep relationship with Mary as a result of a pilgrimage to Medjugorje.

In Full of Grace: Miraculous Stories of Healing and Conversion Through Mary’s Intercession, Watkins shares her own and five other incredible stories of lives transformed by God and the miracle of Mary’s apparitions at Medjugorje. While the apparitions at Medjugorje have not been formally endorsed by the Church (and indeed can’t be until they are completed), they meet all the criteria for an authentic apparition. Many Bishops have visited there and Pope John Paul II stated that “Medjugorje is hope for the entire world. And if I were not Pope, I would have been in Medjugorje a long time ago.”

Full of Grace is not for the faint of heart. The subject matter includes children dying in the sewers of Columbia, drug abuse, and strippers. The stories, however, have the power to change lives. They show the ability of God to work in the midst of the most horrible situations. As Watkins states, “In telling their stories, these ordinary people opened the door to their extraordinary lives – to a view more fantastic than fiction – and showed how God lifted them into his loving arms, often out of a living hell, and raised them up to the heights.” Each of the stories is followed by questions and a faith exercise, useful for personal reflection or in a book or prayer group.

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Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Depression is hard to describe to someone who has never experienced it. Those who have been blessed to have escaped this particular affliction often say things like “Think positive,” or “Snap out of it,” or “Choosing to be depressed in a sin because you have lost your trust in God.” They mean well, but they truly do not understand.

When someone is depressed, nothing has much meaning. There is little or no hope. You feel worthless and that life is not worth living. The darkness descends upon you and it feels as if there is no escape. You either want to sleep all the time or have difficulty sleeping.

Depression is not a choice. While it can be brought on by a traumatic event, just as often it is brought on by a chemical imbalance in the body. Some people are just naturally prone to it. Especially in women, hormonal shifts due to monthly cycles or pregnancy can be brutal. Lack of sleep has an impact. Lack of natural light can also be a huge factor.

Depression can hit suddenly. I have compared it to being hit over the head by a two by four. I can be fine one day and wake up the next feeling nothing but despair. Perhaps the hardest part is not knowing when the darkness will lift.

How then does one cope? I am not a mental health professional. These suggestions come only from my personal experience of suffering from depression for nearly twenty-five years, but I hope that they may be of help. Also, please note that children can suffer from depression as well. If your child is having difficulty, please do not ignore their symptoms.

1. Seek professional help – there is no shame in asking for help. Some cases of depression are so severe that they require medication. If you are at risk of harming yourself or someone else, seek immediate care. Even with milder cases, simply having someone to talk with on a regular basis can be a tremendous help.
2. Keep busy – Keeping your mind occupied with other things helps keep the negative self-talk at bay. Accomplishing a given task can also help alleviate the feelings of worthlessness, at least for a while.
3. Take care of yourself, body and soul – eat well, exercise, and pray. These three things can go a long way in maintaining emotional equilibrium.
4. Invest in some full spectrum light bulbs – I always thought one needed a light box to get any benefit from light therapy, but they are costly so I resisted the idea. Last year I discovered that full spectrum light bulbs can help achieve similar results. These light bulbs are available at department or hardware stores and cost only a bit more than regular bulbs. They come in various styles and can be used in most light fixtures. They made a huge difference!
5. Know that this, too, will pass – It doesn’t seem like it when you are going through it, but the darkness will end. The light will come again. Keep believing in that fact.

Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

In The Sacraments We Celebrate: A Catholic Guide to the Seven Mysteries of Faith, Msgr. Peter Vaghi discusses how the Eucharist was designed to feed both our bodies and our souls. He points out how the only miracle that is told in all four Gospel accounts is the multiplication of the loaves and fishes. It is “surely an image of the Eucharistic bread. ‘for the Jewish feast of the Passover was near.’ Even the language in John 6:11 recalls the institution of the Eucharist – ‘Jesus then took the loaves of bread, gave thanks [eucharistein] and passed them around.’” Jesus fed the multitude in body and in spirit.

He continues to do so today. The Eucharist is the gift of Jesus himself. It is both physical and spiritual food. While the appreciation of physical satisfaction may only occur when we go to Mass hungry, we are always in need of spiritual food.

What does it mean to be spiritually hungry? How does the Eucharist satisfy that desire? Msgr. Vaghi states that Jesus addresses “the same kind of hunger in us that he did in the crowds of people assembled in John 6, a hunger for belonging, a hunger for healing and reconciliation, a hunger for growth in holiness. . . Yes, Jesus nourishes us, that deep hunger for God, a deep hunger satisfied by the Eucharist, the bread of life, the source of our life, this sacrament of love.”

I know in my own life that if I only go to Mass and receive the Eucharist once a week, I find it much harder to get through the week than if I am able to go at least one extra time. The Eucharist gives me a strength and a peace that I cannot get through any other means. Yes, I can pray (and I do!) and it helps tremendously. I can go to adoration and sit in the presence of Jesus and that offers much grace as well. Still, nothing is like receiving the Eucharist itself.

I know I don’t fully understand the mystery of the Eucharist, but I believe that Jesus is truly there, that He comes into each of our hearts and our bodies. He does this because He loves us and wants to offer the very gift of Himself to us. He knew that life is hard. He knew we would be hungry – that we would need food for the journey. The Eucharist is our food. It strengthens us, body and soul.



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

I recently had the great pleasure of reading “Walking Together: Discovering the Catholic Tradition of Spiritual Friendship,” a new book by Mary DeTurris Poust. Spiritual friendship is the deepest type of friendship. As Poust states, “these are the friends with whom you can be completely yourself, the friends who may disagree with you from time to time but never consider walking away. They are the friends who bring you dinner when you are sick, pray for you when you you’re struggling, and remind you that you are never alone.” Jesus himself had spiritual friends. He had many followers and several friends, but there were those whom he held especially close. These included Lazarus, Mary, and Martha, Mary Magdalene, and among the Apostles, Peter and John. When he sent his followers out, he always sent them in pairs. “Just like those first disciples, we are clearly not meant to walk this spiritual journey alone. Spiritual friends are not exotic or rare, but necessary.”

What sets spiritual friendships apart from other close friendships is that God is at the center. The friendship exists for the benefit of both parties. Both seek to serve the other and help them on their journey to heaven. St. Francis de Sales held up the Trinity as the role model for unconditional love and perfect friendship. While we humans can never achieve that level of perfection, spiritual friendship aims for that level of self-giving and focus on God. It is as close to unconditional love as we can come in this world. “Spiritual friends do not judge one another on worldly terms, but on God’s terms. They do not fret over the little things that annoy or frustrate, but focus instead on the big picture. They offer each other guidance and support, maybe even a firm challenge if one or the other is going off in an unhealthy direction. But always the actions are based in love, not in anger or jealousy or manipulation.”

Spiritual friendships are based on trust. Unlike some other friendships in which people may be willing to share part of themselves, spiritual friendships embrace the whole person. They are based on listening, talking, and prayer. Both parties must feel safe to reveal their innermost selves. They may not stay in constant communication with each other, but even time and distance do not sever the bond. “Spiritual friends are always connected, always in a kind of mental and spiritual communication, even when they are not talking or writing. . . This kind of deep bond is not something that develops overnight, but grows slowly as trust builds. That kind of communication between friends can develop only with open communication that truly allows friends to enter into each other’s hearts.”

It is important to note that spiritual friendships can exist between any two people. They can exist between a husband and wife, siblings, parent and child, a man and a woman, two women or two men. They do not need to be of the same background or faith. What matters is that God is at the center of the friendship. Spiritual friendships are very important and beneficial. Those who have them are extremely blessed.



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Reviewed by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Every now and then, a novel comes along that is so powerful and so well-written that it will stay with you forever.  Rachel’s Contrition by Michelle Buckman is that kind of novel. Part of the Chisel and Cross imprint from Sophia Institute Press, it is Catholic fiction at its finest. If you are looking for light-hearted escapism, this is not the story for you. Rather, this is a story that delves into the deepest and darkest parts of humanity. Throughout the course of this book, the reader must face the evils of jealousy, murder, rape, and the inner workings of a mentally ill mind.

Rachel is a mother whose small daughter has died tragically. She is buried in her grief, unable to see any light at all. She has lost everything. Her husband has sent her away and her surviving son, whom she sees only sporadically, seems to hate her. She lives in a drug-induced haze where memories from both past and present come to haunt her. Into that haze walks Lilly, a young teen suffering from her own secrets and pain. With Lilly’s help and some divine intervention in the form of St. Therese’s autobiography, “Story of a Soul,” Rachel begins the long road back.

One interesting feature of this novel is that Buckman focuses on the dark side of St. Therese. Her little way is there and Rachel does learn from that and attempts to put it into practice. But that is not what comforts her. Rather, in St. Therese, she finds someone who understands the darkness. St. Therese wrote, “But it was night, the dark night of the soul. Like Jesus during his agony in the garden, I felt myself abandoned and there was no help for me on earth or in heaven. God had abandoned me. . . I wish I could express what I feel, but it is beyond me. One must have passed through this dark tunnel to understand its blackness.”

Buckman writes of that darkness with such realism. One can only presume that she herself has walked through it. Rachel’s Contrition is a novel for all who have been deeply wounded by life. It is a painful story with no easy answers, but it offers the promise of healing. It is a glimmer of light in the midst of the dark. It is a novel that will twist your heart and leave you breathless. You will not want to put it down until you reach the final word at which point you will once again be able to exhale.

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Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Marthe Robin and the Foyers of Charity

Reviewed by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Marthe Robin and the Foyers of Charity was written to help introduce more of the English-speaking world to the French Servant of God Marthe Robin, a suffering soul who lived solely for God. Robin lived from 1902-1981 and neither ate nor drank for many years of her life. Her only nourishment came from her weekly Eucharist. At age 26, she was paralyzed. She would spent most of her life on a divan bed in a darkened room. Yet, she met with over a hundred thousand people who sought her spiritual advice, left behind a great deal of writings, and began a lay movement known as the “Foyers of Charity.”

Relatively healthy as a child, her health began to decline when she was sixteen. She began to understand that her life was to be one of suffering. The early 1920s saw a rapid progression of her physical difficulties. During this period, she experienced some spiritual hardships as well. As biographer Martin Blake states, “Marthe was still torn between giving all to God and hoping for a normal life. It was the priest of Saint-Uze who recalled her saying: ‘I struggled with God!’ The years 1923 to 1925 were filled with anguish.” By 1930, she would totally dedicate herself to Jesus. She wrote, “I dared to choose Jesus Christ. One day, having consecrated myself to Him and received clear proof that my humble act of Abandonment had been accepted, He revealed himself to me and gave himself spiritually to me as the spouse of my soul, living and active.” She would receive the stigmata (the physical wounds of Jesus on the cross) and from 1931 she began to have a weekly experience of the Lord’s Passion.

In 1936, Fr. Georges Finet first met Marthe Robin. Together they would begin “Foyers of Light, Charity, and Love.” These Foyers would consist of consecrated lay people under the direction of a priest. Five day silent retreats would be offered. There are currently “more than seventy Foyers spread over five continents.” Foyers are only formed with the permission of the local Bishop.

In Marthe Robin and the Foyers of Charity, Blake introduces readers to this amazing woman who suffered so much for the glory of God and the salvation of souls. He discusses her life, her mysticism, and her mission. He includes the perspectives of those who knew her and wrote about her. He also explores her connection with St. Therese of the Child Jesus and St. Faustina Kowalska. While her official designation as “Blessed” is still under consideration, there can be little doubt that she was a holy woman dedicated to God and the Church who can serve as a role model in our spiritual journeys. Hers is an incredible story, well-worth learning about.

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Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

The obvious answer to that question should be “no.” God will not be slow to answer them. However, anyone who has spent some time in prayer knows that slow in God’s world is not the same as slow in ours. While swift miracles sometimes happen, God frequently does not answer our prayers in the way we would like or on the time table we would prefer. We think we know best. God has a different idea. If He is making us wait, or taking us on a different path than the one we would like to be walking, there is a reason for it. In time, perhaps in the next life if not in this one, it will all make sense. The only prayer that is always truly answered is the one from the Lord’s prayer: “Thy will be done.”

Yet, we are still called to be persistent in prayer, especially in those times when the answers are not clear or forthcoming. This is a time of waiting on God. Those are the times when we still need to pray. We cannot become frustrated and stop praying, believing that God doesn’t care or that He isn’t paying attention. God always cares about what troubles us, even when we don’t feel that way. These are the times when our faith is tested, and paradoxically, strengthened.

Waiting is hard. Being persistent in prayer is difficult. It can definitely make you want to curl up and cry. It is perfectly normal to do so. However, even in those times of darkness and uncertainty, we need to be like that widow and keep asking for help. The prayers help, even when it seems nothing is happening. They help give us acceptance and courage and the will to keep going. Be persistent in prayer and trust that God is right there with you in the waiting. When the time is right, He will answer.

Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Teresa wrote reluctantly and felt that she had little to offer that had not already been said. She also emphasized that her description and her path to the center of this castle was not the only one. She believed that “Our Lord will be granting me a great favour if a single one of these nuns should find that my words help her to praise Him a little better.” She focuses on the beauty of the soul and laments that we spend so much attention on our physical body and so little on the divine spark that is within.

Teresa focuses on gaining self-knowledge, but not in the way we in the 21st century interpret that term. For her, self-knowledge means coming to know the soul within. It means understanding our dependence on God and gaining humility by acknowledging that we are nothing without Him. The route to self-knowledge and entry into the interior castle comes through prayer and meditation. As one progresses through the mansions, one comes to know and long for God more and more and to reject the world and its attractions. Teresa encourages the beginner in prayer “to labour and be resolute and prepare himself with all possible diligence to bring his will into conforming with the will of God.” She also offers encouragement: “If, then, you sometimes fall, do not lose heart or cease striving to make progress, for even out of your fall God will bring good.” Teresa also makes the point that prayer leads to action rooted in love. “True perfection consists in the love of God and of our neighbor, and the more nearly perfect is our observance of these two commandments, the nearer to perfection we shall be.”

As one makes her way ever deeper into the heart of the castle, increased spiritual consolations and trials become par for the course. Many (perhaps even most) do not reach the most inner mansions in this lifetime. Teresa is quick to point out, however, that “the Lord gives when He wills and as He wills and to whom He wills, and as the gifts are His own, this is doing no injustice to anyone.” Indeed she cautions her readers to never believe that they deserve any gift that the Lord bestows upon them, nor should we set out to obtain any consolations or mystical experiences because “the most essential thing is that we should love God without any motive of self-interest.”

Teresa was truly granted amazing gifts of insight and experience from God. While we may not fully share in her experience, Interior Castle offers a unique portrait of our souls and invites us into a deeper relationship with God.

Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith.”
The Lord replied,
“If you have faith the size of a mustard seed,
you would say to this mulberry tree,
‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you. Luke 17:5-6

Have you moved any mulberry trees lately? If you have, I’d be willing to bet that it involved a great deal of back-breaking labor and some heavy machinery. As I heard this Gospel, I thought, “Wow! If I had enough faith, I could clean my house with a lot less effort.” Obviously, that isn’t the case.

What, then, is Jesus trying to tell his Apostles and us in this Gospel?  Jesus liked to use exaggeration to get his listeners attention. This is definitely one of those cases. So, despite the fact that we are unlikely to move any trees or clean our houses simply by believing that it can be so, the message is that our faith can still do amazing things.

Faith is what leads us to prayer. We believe that a higher power is in control. We know that we don’t have to do it all on our own. Honestly, I can’t even imagine trying to get through life that way. We have a God who loves us and is looking out for our best interests. We can talk to Him and ask for help. We can let Him lead us where He wants us to go.

Having that faith does not mean that life will be easy, however. I cringe whenever I hear someone preaching the (false) Gospel of prosperity with its message, “Believe in God and you will have success in this world.” Jesus never promised us success in this world. He never said that we wouldn’t suffer and would never get sick. In fact, he promised the exact opposite. He told us that following him meant picking up our cross, but he guaranteed that it would all be worth it in the end.

We all have metaphorical mulberry trees in our lives, the problems that have deep roots and simply won’t go away. Our faith allows us to believe that those problems will somehow be resolved and the tree will move. Maybe that tree is even there for a reason we can’t fully understand. Sure, it blocks our view and seems insurmountable. We wish it wasn’t there, but our faith is what keeps us going, despite the big obstacle in the way. Plus, we do know and trust that miracles do happen. Prayers do get answered (sometimes even in the way we hoped for!). Sometimes, those trees do get moved in amazing ways. Other times, they move slowly with lots of heavy labor. Jesus didn’t give a timetable for those trees moving into the sea. But, with faith and trust, they do eventually move.

What are the trees that need moving in your life? Do you have enough faith to turn them over to God? Are you able to trust that He knows what He is doing?



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Reviewed by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur
http://spiritualwomanthoughts.blogspot.com

When one mentions love stories, I’d be willing to bet that the first thing that comes to mind is not the Bible. One tends to think of romantic movies or novels. Perhaps one might think of couples one knows whose love stands out in the crowd. Yet, God is the author of love and the Bible, as the word of God, is a wonderful place to look for examples of love and role models for our own relationships. In The Bible’s Best Love Stories, Allan F. Wright examines some of the very human love stories contained in the pages of scripture. These stories do not show an idealistic portrayal of love. Rather they show the full range of deep emotions and all the challenges along the way. Wright does not only study the portrayal of romantic relationships, but also the love of good friends and familial relationships.

Wright begins his examination, as one might expect, with the relationship between Adam and Eve, “the world’s first lovers.” Before the first sin, they had the beauty of the ideal relationship; it was a union of the whole person – body and soul. They loved each other as God loved them. But then, they thought they knew better than God and sin came into the world. Their relationship, which had been so perfect, now was one of shame and blame. Things would never be the same for them, or us, again. We will come up short, yet we are all called to still strive for that original self-giving love that existed before sin.

Wright then turns his attention to other famous pairs of the Old Testament: Abraham and Sarah, Jacob and Rachel, Abigail and David, Tobiah and Sarah, and the unnamed lovers in the “Song of Solomon.” He also explores the familial love of Joseph and his brothers and Ruth and Naomi and the bonds of friendship that existed between David and Jonathan. The New Testament features fewer romantic relationships, but Wright looks at Zechariah and Elizabeth, Mary and Joseph, and Priscilla and Aquila. Some of Jesus’ friendships are highlighted, such as those with Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, as well as his bond with Peter. His relationship with the “sinful woman’ is also examined. The relationship between Saint Paul and Barnabas, and that which existed among Mary Magdalene, Peter, and John are also looked at. While some of these stories are relatively familiar, Wright looks at them with fresh eyes, pointing out things we may have missed in the relationships and holding up certain aspects for special attention.

The Bible illustrates all the different types of love. It shows that loving anyone will require commitment and sacrifice. There is no such thing as an easy love, although some days will certainly be easier than others. Love will sometimes need to be waited for, but trust in God is paramount. Wright has done a beautiful job portraying these stories with understanding and wisdom. For each story, he offers a prayer, a relevant quote, reflection questions, and an idea for putting love into action in one’s own life. These additions help make this book ideal for a bible study or for private reflection.

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Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

What do to-do lists have to do with setting goals? To-do lists are made up of small doable tasks. They are action items. Do the thing and you get to scratch it off the list. It may go back on the list tomorrow, but for this day the mission has been accomplished. When people make goals (myself included), it is easy to think big. This is good. It is wonderful to dream. This is where many people get stuck. They can see where they want to be and they can see where they are now. What they don’t know is how to get there. It’s easy to get discouraged – to look at the dream and to throw in the towel. It is so far away. How could I ever get there? What’s the point? At these moments, it is important to note that the road from point A to point B is not one giant step. It is made up of smaller steps, actions that can be placed on a to-do list and accomplished one day at a time.

For example, my Bible study friends and I were all talking about how we would like to rid our homes of clutter. This is a big job. One look around my house (or my friends’ houses) and it would be easy to give up. However, we have started a plan. One of my friends sends out a Facebook message to each of us with our task for the day. These tasks are supposed to take about fifteen minutes a day. That’s doable. It’s currently an item on my actual to-do list – “Clean 15 minutes.” When it is done for that day, it is crossed off. I feel like I have accomplished my goal for the day and my house is slowly getting cleaner. Will my house ever be entirely clutter-free? Probably not, but I will be a lot closer than if I had done nothing.

This process can be applied to almost everything – even our spiritual lives. In this case, the goal is heaven. That’s a big goal. We can take a look at our lives and easily get discouraged. However, we don’t need to look at the rest of our lives in one fell swoop. We only need to worry about today. What are some things we can add to our daily to-do list to help us make spiritual progress? Have you always wanted to read the Bible, but can never seem to squeeze it in? Perhaps you could put “read Bible for 5 minutes” on your to-do list. Everyone has five minutes. Start small. You can always add to it. Maybe you have always wanted to say the rosary, but never seem to get to it. Start with one decade. Go ahead – put “say one decade of the rosary” on your to-do list. Perhaps you would like to do more to help the poor? On the to-do list could be “pick out 5 food items to donate to a local food pantry” or “Take three items out of closet that no longer fit and donate them.” These are small things, yes. They won’t change the world, but they will be a start. As one becomes accustomed to doing these things regularly, it will be easier to add other things on. You will find you have more time for prayer and spiritual reading. You will find more ways to help the poor. Make small goals that lead to bigger ones. Start walking the road. If you miss a day, start again the next. You have nothing to lose, and everything to gain.



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

We have a God who loves us and created us because He wanted us to know, love and serve Him and ultimately be happy with him in heaven. He wants what is good for us. Sometimes, that is hard to understand and accept. After all, there are all those rules. Aren’t they all meant to take away our fun and suck all the pleasure out of life? Sometimes, it can seem that way. But, think for a moment about true human love. If you truly love another person, you want what is best for him or her, even if it is not what might be in your own best interest. Sometimes, that person might not even consider it to be what is best for him or her.

Think of a parent who loves her child. (For the sake of argument, we’ll use a mother. It could just as easily be a father). Parenthood can be one of the most selfless human loves in existence. A mother spends years caring for a child, attempting to form his character, enforcing rules, gently guiding the development of his interests, encouraging, educating, and being a shoulder to cry on. In response, a child often rebels and frequently dislikes the parent. A good mother wants what is best for her child, even though it may cost her dearly. When a child makes a poor decision (regardless of the child’s age), it wounds the parent deeply.

With God, He is the parent and we are the children, except on an even deeper level. We are His creation in a way our own physical children never could be. We did not create our children. God sent them. We welcomed them. They are pure gift. On the other hand, without God’s thought willing us into existence, we would not be. God formed every part of us. He knows every hair on our head, every cell within our bodies, our interests and longings, our hurts and challenges. He sees all that we could be and longs for us to fulfill our purpose. He gives us rules for good behavior so that we might know what to do. He watches us and wants us to make good decisions. He wants us to love Him and love our neighbor in a selfless manner. He wants what is best for us. When we fail, we do offend Him. That is sin.

Aquinas’ quote also offers a question to ask when making decisions. Is this good for me? Is this activity or decision beneficial to my spiritual, physical, and emotional well-being? Is this what God would want me to do? Imagine how life might be different if this was the standard by which we shaped our lives.



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Saying that we are sorry when we have wronged someone is important. It is one of those things parents tell children to do from their earliest ages. By way of example, one toddler smacks another over the head with their toy of choice. In most cases, the toy is taken away or given to the other child, and then the offending child is then instructed to say “I’m sorry.” Is the child actually sorry? Probably not. Feeling true contrition is something that comes with time. Soon enough, however, the child will experience it and will know what to do when he or she has hurt someone else. It is an important life lesson.

As adults, we say that we are sorry often. I said it myself a few minutes ago when I accidentally stepped on my dog’s tail. I hadn’t realized that she had positioned herself under my legs until I moved my foot. We brush up against someone in the supermarket. We say we are sorry. We realize that we interrupted someone. We say we are sorry. These are the times when it is easy to say that we are sorry. We say it. The other person acknowledges it, and life moves on.

There are times, though, when it is much harder to say that we are sorry – the times when we have intentionally wronged someone and must begin the process of reconciliation. Those are also the times when we must make amends. We must try to do something to make up for the hurt we have caused. This is the much harder task. Sometimes it is not even possible. Still, we must make the effort.

In Richard Paul Evan’s story “The Christmas List,” James Kier is a modern day Scrooge. The man has ruined several lives through his selfishness and business dealings. After his obituary is published erroneously, he gets to read the online comments – most of which are anything but good. People are happy he is dead and Kier has the opportunity to face the reality of his life. He decides to do something about his legacy, and tries to make amends with the people he has hurt. He doesn’t think it will be easy, but he has no idea how truly hard it will be. The first person he reaches out to won’t even let him get a word in. Instead, he breaks Kier’s nose and sticks his dogs on him.

In time, he is able to make some things right. For some people, however, it is simply too late. Witness the response of an older woman whom he had caused great financial loss. She does forgive him. In fact, she states that she forgave him long before. Unfortunately, paying back the monetary damages will do little good. “So you see, Mr. Kier, you can’t make amends. You can’t give me back my land. You can’t give me back my health. You can’t give me back my husband and you can’t give me back my dreams. You certainly can’t give me back my innocence.” Those truthful words cause him more pain than his broken nose. In the end, he decides to use the money he owed her to establish a scholarship in her name.

Saying we are sorry is important. Realizing that our wrongdoing has consequences for others is even more important. When we have caused someone harm, we must do what we can to make it right. It may not always be possible, but we need to make our best effort.



Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

When I was a child, there was a particular relative who seemed to have everything I didn’t. We were close in age, and she was smarter, prettier, and more athletic. When I was fifteen, I made a list of things I want to accomplish by the time I was twenty-five. Getting over my jealousy of her was on the list. I’m happy to say that I succeeded. By that time, there were other people to be envious of – the friends with nicer homes and better jobs and who had been blessed with children (which I was having difficulty conceiving). Yes, thankfully, I moved beyond that as well. Of course, then I was envious of the mothers who had it all together. Nine years into mothering later, I realize that was actually all an illusion and that none of us really have it all together – we all just do the best we can.

The purpose of this article isn’t to share with you my personal list of sins. Rather, it is to discuss something I am certain I can’t be the only one struggling with – envy brought on by social networking. Social networking can bring many benefits. It is a wonderful way to connect with friends and relatives. We can laugh, share, encourage, and mourn with each other. It can be a way to evangelize and the largest prayer chain ever.

With the good comes the bad, however. In the old days, one did not have to face other people’s accomplishments on a daily basis. Most people do not go around announcing everything wonderful that has happened to them and their children recently when you meet them in the grocery store. You simply exchange a few pleasantries and move on. Alumni newsletters came maybe twice a year. One could read through the list of great deeds accomplished, promotions gained, and children had in one fell swoop, be happy for them, experience the slight wave of envy, and move on.

Today, it is a constant. I have a wonderful group of on-line and in-person friends. They are talented and successful. I am blessed to have these people in my life. Every day, someone is doing something amazing and they share it, which is totally understandable. They are happy, or they are promoting some new project and want others to share their joy or help in their efforts. If I was a better person, I would always be happy for them. Truly, most of the time I am happy for them, even when the green monster feels the need to raise its ugly head. The two aren’t necessarily mutually incompatible. But I do wish I could have one without the other. I wish I could get at a place in my life where this would not be an issue – where I could be happy for all the good that is going on in other people’s lives without feeling bad about my own. I realize that this has nothing to do with them. This is my problem, my cross, and my sin.

So, then, what to do about it? How do people like me (once again I am certain I am not the only one suffering from this) get beyond the envy to just be happy for others?  I have found that there are a few sure-fire cures for envy. Top on the list is to pray for the person you are envious of. Pray for all the success and blessings they should have to come to them. This is a particularly good tactic when there is one person in particular you are envious of. It will eventually, with God’s help, change your heart. Another good thing to do is to try to do something good for that person to celebrate or add to their good fortune. Lastly, the best cure for envy is to realize all the good things you have been blessed with. Envy is basically being unhappy with what you have. It is a sin of selfishness. The antidote is gratitude. Be thankful. Make a list of all the blessings in your own life and repeat them until you get to a true place of gratitude to God.

Social networking is part of life today. It is a great blessing, and I truly do enjoy being part of that larger world and hearing what everyone is up to. Now, if you will excuse me, I have a list of things to be thankful for to get working on . . .

Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

Christmas is About Jesus

Reviewed by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

It might seem a bit early to be thinking about Christmas, but Advent will be here before we know it, along with all the hustle and bustle that goes along with that time of year. “Christmas is About Jesus” is a lovely little book that will help children (and their parents) focus on the true meaning of Christmas. Each day from December 1^st through the 24^th features a Scripture verse and a reflection on a symbol of Christmas and how that symbol reminds us of Jesus. Some of the symbols covered include snowflakes, candy canes, ornaments, St. Nicholas, Christmas trees, Christmas lights, cookies, songs, and stars. As the days get closer to Christmas, the devotions focus on those who were at the first Christmas – the wise men, shepherds, Mary, and the most important one of all, Jesus.

The book is attractively designed and easy to use. It could be used at home or as part of a religious education class. The reflections could be used alone or combined with a craft for a longer lesson. “Christmas is About Jesus” will help keep minds focused on Jesus during the Advent season.

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Copyright 2010 Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur